Building a Helping Relationship

The Egan's skilled helper model holds its strengths and weaknesses. The model conveys a good starting point for a counseling relationship, but more careful consideration is needed to ensure the client feels comfortable and open. Stage 1 skills are crucial for establishing a good rapport, while Stage 2 skills facilitate gaining further understanding of the client's concerns. As the weeks progressed, my use of stage 2 skills increased, with a focus on securing a good connection before moving forward.

A245CAR:
Intermediate
Counselling
Skills
With reference to Egan's skilled helper model, identify the role
of the helper, describing the life-cycle of this relationship and
the helping and hindering factors in the formation of the
relationship. Then reflecting upon your learning, evaluate your
development of stage 1 and 2 counselling skills.
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Word Count: 1646 words
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Egan’s skilled helper model will be described and evaluated throughout this work.
The model aims to address three vital questions, which are revealed in the three
stages; what is going on? What do I want instead? And how might I get to what I
want? (Egan, 2013).
The role of the helper is very important when determining how well the relationship is
between the helper and helpee. The main factors that are vital as a helper is
understanding emotions. This is essential for creating empathy towards the client. It
is crucial for the helpee to portray that they are a good active listener. This is
significant to ensure that they are showing interest, both verbally and non-verbally
(Nelson-Jones, 2015).
In relation to Gerard Egan’s Skilled Helper Model, it is necessary to understand the
importance of different skills and qualities a helper must have (Egan, 2013). The role
of the helper can be related to the beginnings and middle stages of the life cycle.
Stage 1 comprises of Carl Roger’s three core conditions; acceptance, genuineness
and empathy (Rogers, 1967).
When the helper begins to accept the client for who they are, this conveys that they
are respecting the client and accepting them in whatever situation that arises. This
can also be referred to as unconditional positive regard (Rogers, 1967).
The role of being genuine revolves around active listening. This can create a stable
relationship to show genuine interest, especially with the use of eye contact and
appropriate body language. Congruence communicates a strong relationship, and
reveals the true nature of the counsellor and their willingness to care in this
relationship.
An empathetic relationship is crucial to ensure that there is an understanding of
feelings, with the use of tentative openers, to indicate that the helpee’s feelings are
not the same as your own.
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Stage 2 tries to demonstrate a higher in depth understanding of the client’s situation
by the helper establishing different perspectives in dealing with events (Resource
Pack, 2016).
Stage 2 empathy solely focuses on a deeper understanding and reaching emotions
which are buried inside the helpee. To do this, the helper will identify themes or
patterns of behaviour. It would be necessary to make associations and links between
different thoughts and feelings (Resource Pack, 2016). The main problem aroused
from this is that if the client is being closed with the helpee, it is difficult to distinguish
advanced feelings, which are hidden inside the client.
Challenging behaviours when using counselling skills, can benefit the helpee, when
irregular signs of body language do not reflect what is being said. Another example
is when the client is blaming another person in the situation. Alternative frames of
reference can be used here, to identify other viewpoints (Wosket, 2008). A limitation
of this section is the client may feel like the helper is almost against them, especially
when mentioning to look at other viewpoints, except their own.
The aim of immediacy is being aware of what is happening in the counselling
relationship at any given time. It is all about open and honest communication
(Stewart and Sutton, 2017). This helps the helper and helpee relationship develop
with the use of direct communication. A major problem would be that the client may
not mention everything that goes on, therefore the helper is not aware of everything.
Self-disclosure is helpful if it keeps the client on target and moves the client to self-
understanding. In addition, the Johari Window can be a useful tool in understanding
self-awareness. It is comprised of 4 areas. The areas include; what is known to self,
not known to self, known to others and not known to others (Luft and Ingham, 1961)
A confrontation, when using counselling skills, is used when mixed signals, or
feelings are present in the client’s thoughts or feelings. However, it should only be
used when a rapport has been built.
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The endings of the helping relationship are evident in Stage 3 skills. This is the
action stage, where the helper will help the client move into considering taking
action. Both stage 1 and 2 skills are used to tackle problems, set goals and think
creatively.
Overall, Egan’s 3 stage model holds its strengths and weaknesses. Whilst the model
conveys a start to a good counselling relationship, more careful consideration would
be needed to ensure that the client is first comfortable with the helper, as well as
ensure that the client can be as open as possible. Moreover, the strengths do
outweigh the weaknesses. For example, Stage 1 skills are a good way to describe
the key components that a helper should have. This would ensure that a good
rapport is maintained. Furthermore, Stage 2 skills are convenient when gaining
further understanding of the client’s thoughts and feelings. Challenging behaviours
make the client think a lot more about the situation, leading them to make a change.
The life cycle is an important way to describe the relationship between the client and
helper. The cycle explains the development of a relationship and how there is always
a beginning, middle and ending. In this case, the beginning is Stage 1, middle is
Stage 2 and ending is Stage 3.
The start of the cycle would involve getting to know the client well, and this can be
achieved through the three core conditions; accepting them, being genuine and
showing empathy. The middle of the life cycle would involve a good rapport built up,
and the client being comfortable and open with the helper. In addition, when this life
cycle is completed, the ultimate goal is for it to end. In this case, when stage 3 skills
are used, the helper will aim to take action and tackle problems. The client will
decide if they have achieved their end goal, and if so this is when the helper and
helpee relationship ends.
The role of the helper is essential, when taking into consideration the different factors
that can affect the formulation of the relationship. The use of supportive listening
provides clients with a sense of being understood and affirmed, which is a helping
factor, as the client will feel accepted and feel like they are not being judged (Nelson-
Jones 2015). Putting the clients first will ensure that they feel cared about by the
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helper and they know that the whole session revolves around them (BACP, 2013).
Open body language plays a significant role in ensuring that the helper is paying
attention. The use of eye contact and appropriate body gestures, such as leaning
forward will make the client understand that you are listening to their problems.
On the other hand, restraining factors can hinder the development of a relationship
between the helper and helpee. A bad posture, such as leaning away shows
inattentiveness. This can cause the client feeling uncomfortable and they feel like
they are not being listened to. In addition, judging the client will have a huge effect
on the relationship. If the client is feeling judged, they may not even want to see the
helper again and will feel like all of their actions are in the wrong (Henkelman and
Paulson, 2006).
Stage 1 and Stage 2 skills can be further used in real-life settings. For example,
towards my future career. My future career aspiration would be to become a clinical
psychologist. This ties in well with the stage 1 and 2 skills as psychologists need
good communication and listening skills. A psychologist would pursue stage 1 skills,
as there would need to be acceptance in the client, genuineness when speaking to
the client, and empathy, especially when observing the client’s behaviours. The
stage 2 skills could also be incorporated in this role. The use of immediacy is vital,
when knowing what is going on with the client. Challenge skills would be essential
when there are mixed signals in a client too. In addition, deeper empathy would
enable the psychologist to put themselves in the patient’s shoes, to find out any
thoughts, that are unrevealed.
During class, I had the opportunity to use counselling skills to create an experience
of being a helper. My observer on week one gave me an average score of 3 out of 5.
However, my lowest score was 2 out of 5, as I did not use much silence and minimal
responses/ My overall comment was that my questions were closed (Observer Sheet
1, 2017).
In week 2, my counselling skills had improved, where my average was 5 out of 5.
Although, I did not demonstrate much facial expressions, I received an overall
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comment that my use of questions was good as well as my minimal responses
(Observer Sheet 2, 2017).
Throughout week 3, stage 2 skills were coming into practice as well as stage 1.
Whilst, my eye contact was good, my use of confrontation and immediacy skills was
very minimal. However, my use of advanced empathy and self-disclosure scored 3
out of 5 (Observer Sheet 3, 2017).
As the weeks progressed, my use of stage 2 skills increased. I scored 5 out of 5 for
using advanced empathy as a skill. However, a main comment was to not swing on
my chair, as this could show that I was not interested (Observer Sheet 4, 2017).
The last two weeks proved to be my highest marks for my stage 1 skills. However,
the stage 2 skills did need to be improved. My overall comments were to focus on
stage 2 skills more as well as use more silences (Observer Sheet 5;6 2017).
In conclusion, Egan’s skilled helper model is an effective tool to use when looking at
stage 1 and 2 skills, as they ensure a good connection can be made. Although, there
is a wide range of helping and hindering factors, that can affect the relationship, it is
crucial to always put the client first and secure a good rapport before moving onto
the stage 2 skills.
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Bacp. (2013). Ethical Framework for Good Practice in Counselling & Psychotherapy.
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Egan, G. (2013). The Skilled Helper: A Problem-Management and Opportunity-
Development Approach to Helping. 10th ed. Chicago: Cengage Learning, pp.5-42.
Faculty of Health and Life Sciences. 2016. Module Resource Pack. Coventry
University, Coventry.
Henkelman, J. and Paulson, B. (2006). The client as expert: Researching hindering
experiences in counselling. Counselling Psychology Quarterly, [online] 19(2),
pp.139-150. Available at:
http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.1080/09515070600788303?needAccess=true
[Accessed 20 Dec. 2017].
Luft, J. and Ingham, H. (1961). The Johari Window/ A Graphic Model of Awareness
in Interpersonal Relations. [online] Available at:
http://www.richerexperiences.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/Johari-Window.pdf
[Accessed 20 Dec. 2017].
Nelson-Jones, R. (2015). Basic counselling skills: A Helper's Manual. 4th ed.
London: SAGE, pp.4-40.
Observation Sheet Week 1. (9th October 2017)
Observation Sheet Week 2. (16th October 2017)
Observation Sheet Week 3. (23rd October 2017)
Observation Sheet Week 4. (30th October 2017)
Observation Sheet Week 5. (6th November 2017)
Observation Sheet Week 6. (13th November 2017)
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Rogers, C. (1967). The Interpersonal Relationship: The Core of Guidance. Harvard
Educational Review, [online] 32(4), pp.85-101. Available at:
http://www.centerfortheperson.org/pdf/the-interpersonal-relationship.pdf [Accessed
20 Dec. 2017].
Stewart, W. and Sutton, J. (2017). Learning to counsel, 4th Edition: How to develop
the skills, insight and knowledge to counsel others. 4th ed. London: Hachette, pp.1-
11.
Wosket, V. (2008). Egan's skilled helper model: Developments and Implications in
Counselling. 1st ed. London: Routledge, pp.2-129.
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