Identifying Social Style

This document discusses the concept of identifying social style and the practice of style flexing in communication. It explores different ways of responding to others and adapting communication techniques based on the individual's communication style. The document also includes personal reflections on assertiveness, responsiveness, and the importance of being a good listener.

Running head: IDENTIFYING SOCIAL STYLE
Identifying Social Style
Name of Student:
Name of the University:
Author note:

1IDENTIFYING SOCIAL STYLE
There are many ways through which an individual can respond to someone regarding
a question or statement that they have made. Some of these ways of responding fall under
these categories: evaluating, interpreting, reassuring, questioning or paraphrasing (Gorawara-
Bhat et al., 2017). Style flex is known as the concept through which an individual temporarily
changes their preferred style of conducting themselves and opts for a more comfortable style
because of the person that they are communicating with at the time.
I first try to judge the kind of person that they are and the way they talk in the first
interaction so I can adjust myself according to their style of communicating. The process
takes on very improvised techniques because strategies to communicate with the other person
starts to develop on the spot during the conversation with the person, as I start to find out
more about the way that they communicate and what the best way will be for me to talk in so
that I can successfully get my message across. There are a few steps that are involved in me
assessing the need for style flexing when I am interacting with someone, and they are as
follows:
1. First words
When I first meet the individual, we exchange some pleasantries and start small talk
to basically get the ball rolling on a conversation to start, and be maintained. During these
small talks, I try to extract some basic information about the person by talking about their
clothes, their nationality, weather trends in the last few days. Not much of this requires a style
flex because they are very general topics.
2. Adapting
After we start progressing on to more specific topics, the other person’s
communication style will become more obvious and that is when I start using style flex to
adjust my communication techniques.

2IDENTIFYING SOCIAL STYLE
3. Flexing
Once I have realized the communication methods that the other person is using while
speaking, the next thing to determine would be which aspects of a topic is most appealing to
them. If they are more motivated by emotional aspects, it will be important to ensure that
feelings are incorporated in the conversation so that they are more involved. Same way, if
they are more interested in facts then bringing up emotions during the conversation would not
be the best idea.
From the questionnaire that I filled out, the scores were above 34 which indicated that
I possess high assertiveness and responsiveness. I showed my results to a very close friend of
mine for over eight years, and her first response was that she was not surprised from. It is was
amusing for me to realize that according to her, everyone had an impression that I am
someone who knows what they’re talking about and can hold their ground, along with being a
highly nurturing individual who has proven to be a great listener. She also noted that I have a
way of making my presence known and felt whenever I am in any room, but not in a negative
way where I make everything about myself. These are all things that I have done
unknowingly according to what I believe is the right thing to do and react to an individual or
a situation that is being presented to me.
Since my responsiveness score is on the higher side, I am hopeful and confident to
call myself a good listener. However, this is not to say that I am still lacking some skills
which would make me a better listener. I believe that style flexing is a big part of me being a
good listener because that indicates that I am able to assess the needs of the other person and
modify my responses in a way that will benefit their wellbeing. I believe that my greatest
avenue for improvement would be on the fact that I am very quick to assume things that may

3IDENTIFYING SOCIAL STYLE
appeal to the other person, and most of the time I get corrected because I assumed wrongly.
Regardless, I have yet to be accused of answering without listening properly, but this is
something that I have noticed in myself which I aim to improve.

4IDENTIFYING SOCIAL STYLE
References:
Gorawara-Bhat, R., Hafskjold, L., Gulbrandsen, P., & Eide, H. (2017). Exploring physicians’
verbal and nonverbal responses to cues/concerns: Learning from incongruent
communication. Patient education and counseling, 100(11), 1979-1989.