Mediation and Conflict Management

This article discusses the importance of mediation and conflict management in everyday life. It describes a mediation session conducted to solve an existing conflict and the mediation model and techniques used. The article also reflects on the lessons learnt from the session.

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Mediation and Conflict Management
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MEDIATION AND CONFLICT MANAGEMENT
Mediation and Conflict Management
Introduction
In everyday life, conflicts are bond to arise due to a number of reasons such as
unfairness and harassment (Faris, 2019). Other causes of conflict include manipulations,
misunderstanding and poor communication skills (Beckwith, 2016). As such, when conflicts
are not handled, they affect the physical, social and mental wellbeing of an individual. As
pointed out by (Brookins, 2019), conflict leads to poor productivity, mental health problems,
violence and employee turnover in organizations. Conflicts could also arise as a result of
perceptions and unmet expectations (Viort, 2011). Therefore, finding solutions to the existing
conflicts is usually paramount. One way of solving existing conflicts is through mediation.
Mediation refers to the process that enables the conflicting parties to solve their disputes
effectively (Randolph, 2019). Mediation is further explained by (Susskind, 2019), as a
voluntary participation of conflicting parties in working towards resolving the conflict.
Mediation is a conflict management model that hinders the conflicting parties from
experiencing costly and lengthy litigation. Additionally, the outcome is usually satisfying.
This paper seeks to reflect on one of the mediation sessions conducted to solve an existing
conflict.
Description of the Conflict
Based on the mediation session led by Jean Munroe, the cause of the conflict was
disparities in relation to who was eligible to have the custody of the child between a couple
that was working on completing their divorce process. The conflict arose because the mother
of the child was determined in having the custody of the child yet according to the father’s
child, that would be impractical because the mother had a low income. Additionally, the

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father of the child claimed that he was the sole breadwinner and even if the mother was to
keep the house that they were residing in, it would be challenging. This is because there was
a substantial amount of mortgage to be paid and the child’s mother could not meet those
payments while at the same time catering for the needs of the child. The mother of the child
had opted to look for a second job but the child’s father was against it because that would
imply that the child would lack the needed care.
Mediation Model Used
The mediation session applied a facilitative mediation model. According to (Shonk,
2018), this type of mediation is also known as traditional mediation. It involves a
professionally trained mediator facilitating the negation of two or more conflicting parties.
The mediator encourages the conflicting parties to reach an agreement without imposing
his/her decision. Therefore, in the mediation session, the mediator pointed out her expertise in
negotiation. Additionally, while conducting the introduction of the session, the mediator
highlighted that her role was to offer guidance and assistance while the conflicting parties
were to do the talking. Therefore, the mediator was there to facilitate the whole process while
providing guidance as a way of coming up with a solution. That meant coming up with
suggestions that would offer a lasting solution to the existing conflict. The mediation model
applied in the session was effective. This is because according to (aamediationcenter.com,
2019), facilitative mediation assists the conflicting parties in comprehending the existing
issues as well as coming up with creative solutions geared towards the specific needs of each
individual. This type of model also accords the conflicting parties total control in coming up
with solutions. Therefore, the same happened in the mediation session led by Jean Munroe.
The couple came up with a number of solutions. One was that they agreed that each of them
was going to contribute towards the payment of the remaining amount of mortgage for the
next eight months. They both agreed that each of them would pay half of the remaining

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amount. The aim of that decision was to grant the child’s mother adequate time so that she
could look for a better job. That was paramount because they both had the desire of according
their son a sustainable home. The other suggestion was that the child’s mother would
refinance the house within the eight months and in the event that she was unable to do that,
she would sell the house and purchase another one that is within the son’s school district.
That would enable her to accomplish her parental duties. As such, the mediation model
worked because the conflicting parties came up with workable solutions that met their
individual interests and those of their son. However, transformative mediation model would
have been more effective. According to (Burgess & burgess, 2017), in transformative
mediation, mediators usually focus on empowering the conflicting parties towards resolving
their conflicts by encouraging them to recognize individual needs and interests. As such, the
aim of the model is usually to transform the conflicting parties and their relationships by
equipping the conflicting parties with skills required in making constructive change. The
mediation process involves creating room for the conflicting parties to talk about their
problems. That assists in clarifying the nature of the problem from the point of view of the
conflicting parties. It also aids in the development of a wide range of options needed in
handling the conflict (Burgess & Burgess, 2017). The process also enable the conflicting
parties to make choices regarding the manner in which they proceed and it gives them room
for understanding the views of each individual. Therefore, with transformative mediation, the
conflicting groups usually reach satisfactory solutions. Additionally, transformative
mediators usually work with the parties in developing ground rules, objectives and the
process that will be used. Furthermore, transformative mediation is usually successful in the
event that either one or both parties become empowered in handling their situation and
having the capability of recognizing concerns and issues of the side. As shared by
(alternativelaw.com, 2017), transformative mediation goes beyond finding solutions to the

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existing conflict but its primary goal is to transform the conflicting parties to being better
persons first and the resolution bit is sometimes applicable as a secondary item. Therefore, if
this type of mediation model was applied in the session led by Jean Munroe, the conflicting
parties would have been accorded the opportunity of better comprehending the concerns of
each other and probably the outcome would have been different because the couple would be
empowered to finding alternative solutions.
Mediation Techniques Used
There are a number of techniques utilized during a mediation session. According to
(Doran & Goldberg, 2017), the techniques include the creation of an environment that feels
safe to the conflicting parties and one that builds trust. Other techniques include recognizing
emotion opportunities, bringing parties back into the present moment and in the event that the
session becomes destructive, the mediator may opt to return to the process. Additionally, the
other technique is allowing parties to sit back and take a deep breath whenever they are
angry. Other techniques as shared by (Shack, 2017) include giving more attention to the
emotions, relationships and causes of conflict among the conflicting parties as well as
eliciting solutions of the conflicting groups. Therefore, based on the mediation session led by
Jean Munroe, one of the techniques utilized was the creation of a conducive environment
characterized with safety and trust. This is because at the beginning of the session, Jean who
was the mediator welcomed the conflicting parties and refreshments were available.
Additionally, the participants were given directions regarding the location of washrooms and
they were accorded the freedom of requesting for a break incase they needed one.
Furthermore, the mediator was concerned about whether any of the participants had health
conditions that required special attention. Additionally, the parties were informed that the
process was confidential and it whatever was going to be discussed could not be used against
them in the court of law. Therefore, all the mentioned factors indicate that the environment

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was safe and due to the reassurance of the mediator that the process would be confidential,
the participants had trust with the process. The other technique that was utilized by the
mediator was bringing the parties back to the present moment. During the session, parties
were given opportunities of airing their concerns and providing suggestions that would aid in
resolving the conflict. Harry who was the child’s father complained of the impractical nature
of the child’s mother decision to taking the custody of their son yet her salary could not offer
their son a sustainable home. According to Harry, it would be difficult for the mother of the
child to care for the needs of their child adequately because the salary that she earned was
little and thus Harry was the main breadwinner. On the other hand, Sally who was the child’s
mother shared her intensions of looking for a second job so that she offer their son a
sustainable home. Therefore, after the conflicting parties had shared their concerns, the
mediator took the initiative of bringing back the parties to the moment, which was coming up
with solutions that would cater for their individual interests and those of their son. The third
technique that was utilized by the mediator is eliciting the suggestions made by the
conflicting parties. For example, the mediator was able to point out a suggestion made by
Sally, which was in relation to looking for a better job or searching for a second job so that
she could accord their son a suitable home. The mentioned techniques were highly utilized
throughout the session and they assisted in coming up with solutions that solved the conflict.
However, more techniques could have been used in ensuring better outcomes of the
mediation session. One of that technique would be paying attention to the emotions and
sources of conflicts between the participants. According to (Shack, 2017), this technique had
a positive effect on settlement. During the mediation session, Harry’s concerns indicated that
he was displeased with the thought of losing his house in the event that Sally was unable to
pay the mortgage to completion. Therefore, the mediator should have paid more attention to
the emotions elicited by both parties. That would assist in pointing out the real issues of the

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conflict and better solutions would have been obtained. Additionally, utilizing the mentioned
technique would have enabled the mediator to reflect on the underlying issues and provide
better guidance to the conflicting parties. The other technique that could have been utilized is
returning to the process in the event that the session became destructive. During the
mediation session, Harry kept repeating his concerns with regards to losing the house.
Therefore, the mediator should have enquired from the conflicting parties about the progress
of the session so far. That would have assisted the parties in regaining control of the
conversation. Consequently, the mediator could have summarized the concerns raised by the
parties and that could have facilitated a better outcome. The other technique that would have
been utilized is joint discussion. As pointed out by (ponhavard.edu, 2018), this technique
involves the mediator and the conflicting parties asking questions once both parties have
presented their issues. This technique assists in arriving at a better comprehension of the
needs of each party. As such, if this technique was utilized in the mediation session, the
results would have been different. The participants would have been granted the opportunity
of adequately comprehending the needs of each other and that would have resulted to having
a pool of suggestions that would offer better solution.
Lesson Learnt From The Session
This conflict has enabled me to figure out the importance of mediation and the role
played by mediators. As pointed out by (mediation.com, 2019), mediators act as educators,
translators and communication facilitators. In the mediation session mediated by Jean
Munroe, she acted as a facilitator of the whole process. Therefore, this conflict has taught me
that conflicts can be solved amicably with the aid of a third party – the mediator. This conflict
has equipped me with knowledge regarding the benefits of mediation. According to
(Randolph, 2019) mediation saves time, cuts on cost, and it safeguards relationships. This is
true because the mediation session took a shorter time compared to the time that would have

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been spent in courts. The conflict has also taught me that good mediators could also make
mistakes. (Sharp, 2011) also supports this deduction. This is because the mediator did not
utilize most of the techniques applicable in mediation processes.

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