Loss of a Parent by an Adolescent: A Critical Analysis of Complicated Grief Reactions and the Role of Helpers

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Loss of a parent by an adolescent
INTRODUCTION
Loss is an unavoidable part of life and the grief is the regular response and is also a part
of the process of healing. The reason for grief can be loss of the loved ones, like parents or
spouse, parents, siblings and or loss of wellbeing or letting them go of a long term grief. Dealing
with losses can be extremely difficult.
Adolescence is a crucial period of life, where individuals often have encounter deaths
such as deaths involving death of the grandparents, parents, siblings, teachers, friends, other
family members and many more. They often encounter the deaths of their favourite celebrities or
their role models or cultural heroes (Cerniglia et al. 2014). As stated by Seiffge-Krenke (2013)
adolescence is the only period, where an individual have to encounter a full range of possible
deaths. Premature loss might cater to serious health and psychological issue in adolescent
individuals. Furthermore, bereavement literatures have mainly focused on parental responses to
the death of a child and quite recently special attention has been given to the emotional responses
displayed by the adolescents. Hence, in this paper we will focus on only one type loss that is the
parental loss by an adolescent. This paper will provide a critical analysis of the complicated grief
reactions that might occur. Furthermore, this paper would reflect on the role of three helpers,
who might help an individual to cope up with the loss.
Critical analysis
The death of a parents might bring serious consequences as it means growing up and
understanding that life is more than fun and games. Wolfelt (2013) have provided some

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speculations regarding the tensions that arises from cognitive, biological, social and emotional
factors. The initial concern is the rapid biological and sexual development. Adolescents becomes
aware of their loss and the fact that the physical deterioration are inevitable, which might
ultimately cause their own death or the death of others (Nolen-Hoeksema, Larson and Larson
2013). Two possibilities can be caused due to this. Adolescents might indulge in risky behaviour,
as many might think that life is too short or that that no one is present to care for them. In
contracts, they might also act too cautiously as they are now aware that they are not invincible or
there is nobody left to care for them and hence they will have to care for themselves.
Losses might affect adolescents in different ways like disbelieving of what has happened.
Immediately after the death people often does not realise what exactly has happened. People
often tries to deny this, feel, numb, shocked or expect to see their loved ones. Excessive grief can
even take a toll on the health causing weight loss or gain, depression, anxiety, lack of ability to
fight against the disease and extreme fatigue (Burke and Neimeyer 2013). Death of near and
loved ones causes people to face their own fears about death or others might fear of a life without
their loved ones, taking new responsibilities. Some might feel angry, that their loved ones have
left or have deserted them or the unfairness of death. Again others might feel the need to blame
someone. Individuals have uneven emotions, which can come and go. Some days might feel
better while in the next minute, individuals might feel intense sadness. This reaction is normal
although many might feel it is crazy.
Another concern is that cognitive maturation increases their ability to think and reflect on
their expectations from future that can include both positive and negative components of living
the life all alone. For revaluating the parental values or establish their own identity, the
adolescents have to accept the inevitability of bereavement, accepting the fact that they are just

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the part of life. Another tension that is formed is when the social relationships among the
families and peers alter. Due to loss of parent adolescents might be forced to develop a social life
outside the family. If adolescents are bullied or ostracised by the peers, they might feel alone
both outside and at the home.
The death of a parents adds tension and stress in an adolescent’s life. It has been found that
feelings of adolescents about development and the death are often interwined and that
achievement of autonomy might threaten the self-esteem of an adolescent.
Normal grief for parental loss can be explained by the Theory of Kubler Ross, who has
developed a five staged model based on his observations. According to this model people under
grief generally travels through stages of denial, where the person refuses to believe about the loss
(Hall 2014). The next stage and necessarily an important stage in the healing process. Anger
helps individuals to dissipate their feelings. Next stage is the bargaining stage, where individuals
might bargain, which might takes the form of a temporary truce. Individuals thinks that if they
bargain, things would get back to the normal. This stage is followed by the depression and
acceptance, where a grieved individual gradually realises the emptiness and the grief enters out
life into a deeper level (Hall 2014). The depressive stage might feel that it would last forever. At
this stage, it is important to understand that depression is not a signs of mental illness and is only
a part of the recovery process. Acceptance can sometimes be confused with the notion of being
“all right” or being all right with whatever that has happened. This stage is all about accepting
the reality that the one who has gone will never come back, which is the permanent reality and
the new norm that needs to be accepted. According to Supiano and Luptak, (2013) adolescence
at this stage, begins to learn more about who they are, trying to get acceptance and belonging
with the peers, improving the sense of connection outside the home. Another model has