A Not So Modest Proposal: A Satirical Essay

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A Not So Modest Proposal: A Satirical Essay
I am angry about our economic framework and the ethos of the political class that abets
undeserved practices. I am likewise anxious to consider options in contrast to the framework,
which we have endured and been complicit with for a really long time. The nation is going
through an economic crisis. Since the fall of Wall Street, unemployment has been our biggest
problem (Toarna and Cojanu 389). While even those who manage to keep their jobs, the salaries
have stagnated for so long that they can barely meet their basic needs. As a symbol of my anger
with both our lawmakers and business leaders, I believe that the only meaningful change has to
be propelled from below, meaning that they originate from the public. Hence, I shall propose a
novel change to our social norms, which would significantly decrease the possibility of social
and economic predicaments in the future.
As a result, I propose that the youth of the country abstain from all sexual activity till the
age of 25! I am sorry fellow students - I know how impossible a task this is for most of you! But
being disciplined sexually during our teens and early adulthood will lead to significant benefits
for the economy, culture, and beyond. I’ll explain how. At a time when the nation is going
through the economic slowdown, a measure of austerity needs to be followed.
And there is nothing austere about activities like dating, romance, and sex. These are
luxuries even during a boom period for the economy, let alone during a crisis. For boys and
young men, keeping their girlfriends happy and satisfied is a costly business. They have to take

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them out to dinners, to the cinema, buy them gifts periodically, among others, which consume
valuable money. Usually, this money is not even theirs but of their parents, which makes it all
the more objectionable. Another critical loss is time. The amount of time young men spend
chatting with their girlfriends about apparently no particular topic is something the weak state of
the economy cannot bear (Lusardi and Mitchell 25). Their time and energies can be better
directed toward creative and constructive activities such as studying for exams, doing
community work, or even yoga and meditation.
The ‘savings’ in terms of money, energy, and time that young men make is equally
applicable to young women. Think of the multi-billion dollar beauty industry that promotes
cosmetics, fashionable clothing, plastic surgery, and other abominations. After all, the main
reason young women dress up well and make themselves pretty is to attract the opposite sex.
When all sexual activity under the age of 25 is outlawed, they would automatically lose the
incentive to waste valuable money on propping up their vanities (Thomas et al. 6). Diverting all
this money into essential expenditures such as tuition fees will help extend quality education to
more number of Americans, which will lead to the growth of social capital (Blažek et al. 37).
This money could also be channeled into creating jobs in the manufacturing sector, which has
long lost out to foreign competition, thereby making ours a predominantly services industry.
There is another compelling argument why voluntary abstinence from sexual activity is
for the social good. Numerous studies bear out the fact that sex, violence, and crime go together.
Psychologically, especially for men, sex can be an outlet for violence (Seffrin 661). The
increasing popularity of sadomasochistic sexual activity supports this thesis. When we consider
how American college and school campuses are periodically run over by a mad gunman, it
becomes clear how our country will be a safer place through restraint over sex.

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Hate crimes as a result of religious, cultural, or linguistic intolerance are also high for a
society that is supposedly ‘advanced.’ Theological texts have always advocated abstinence for
its moral merit. The Hindu Yogic tradition and Buddhist philosophy emphasize how control
over sexual urges is of primary importance to achieve inner harmony and spiritual progress. In
Christian theology, there is the central doctrine of the Original Sin. Hence, it is reasonably clear
why the policy of sexual abstinence for young men and women below the age of 25 is good for
society as well as for the economy (Arestis 21).
One of the fundamental purposes for our general public's repeated falls into financial
crisis is 'voracity' both at the level of individuals and the level of government institutions (Boyce
et al. 9). What's more, cosmetics and high fashion are a portion of those thrilling items that have
come to speak to represent conspicuous consumption. Through their limited use, sensible reserve
funds can be made by an average American family unit, which will lighten the financial crisis in
two different ways. To start with, the cash spared by families can be used for purchasing other
fundamental products, in this manner invigorating the economy (Vieira 221). Second, it will
instil a culture of solidarity rather than particular individual gain, for, all things considered,
trying to seek a partner and maintaining an interpersonal relationship has no utility for the
society at large. Moreover, I would argue that young women (including those in this class) are
naturally pretty that they don’t need cosmetics or haute couture to enhance their appeal. They are
as great as they are!
I believe that my modest proposal will realize a culture of brotherhood and solidarity
among our residents. Without a doubt, in view of the achievement of the Occupy Wall Street
development, it isn't amazing to envision a comparable crusade for sexual abstinence among the
young. We deserve it and to the remainder of mankind to make this revolution, reestablish a