A Comparative Analysis of Grief Models: Worden and Neimeyer's Theories

This essay provides a comprehensive overview of grief models, focusing on the traditional Worden model and the contemporary approach of Robert A. Neimeyer. It begins by outlining Worden's four tasks of mourning, which include accepting the reality of loss, working through the pain, adjusting to life without the deceased, and finding an enduring connection. The essay then contrasts this with Neimeyer's contemporary model, discussing his workshop approach and emphasis on processing the event story of the death. Furthermore, the essay integrates elements of both models, highlighting the importance of understanding the multifaceted nature of grief and the varying ways individuals cope with loss. The content is supported by an observation made of the author's brother-in-law, who lost his wife, demonstrating the practical application of these models. The essay underscores the significance of time, emotional expression, and finding enduring connections in the grieving process, concluding with the understanding that while both models offer valuable insights, individual experiences of grief can vary significantly.

Models of Grief

Contents
INTRODUCTION...........................................................................................................................1
PART A...........................................................................................................................................1
The traditional models of grief (Worden model).........................................................................1
PART B...........................................................................................................................................4
Contemporary model (Robert A Neimeyer)................................................................................4
PART C...........................................................................................................................................6
Integrating elements of both traditional and contemporary models............................................6
CONCLUSION................................................................................................................................7
REFERENCES................................................................................................................................8

INTRODUCTION
Grief can be determined as a multifaceted response of losing someone. The type of
behaviour that individuals show at the situation of any tragedy like death differs (Parkes and
Prigerson, 2013). Some may be able to overcome them and there will be few who fail to
overcome them even after the incident would have occurred many years ago. The present case is
based on observations made for my brother in law who lost my sister as she died due to breast
cancer.
PART A
The traditional models of grief (Worden model)
Worden model was suggested by William Worden that consists of four different type of
tasks through which a person goes through. There are conditions in which some of the people
also return to some of the task several times (Stroebe and Schut, 2010). These happen when the
individual grow older, their perception and their feelings of events that change. As per the
experiences that are being portrayed, my brother in law who lost my sister went off rails in the
first 12 months since Jan passed away. This is a type of condition in which the love and affection
that a person has for the dead person comes out knowing that they will never be able to see them
or be with them. Death is considered to be a truth of life that no one can escape. However, the
pain to live with it knowledge individuals will not return (Holland and Neimeyer, 2010). In
accordance with the stages that are included in the model Worden, for type of tasks are as
follows:
Accept the reality of the loss: This is a task in which a person who has lost their dear once
goes through a stage in which they understand the reality but try not to accept it (O’Connor,
Lasgaard and Guldin, 2010). When a person’s dies, then there are conditions of shock or
disbelief in which one is not even able to perform their basic day to day operations in effective
manner. In order to avoid the pay a person can pretend that the death never happened.
Acceptance of a person’s death is possible when they are able to divert the pain. For example, a
person will aim at considering the all the situation happened was just a dream and it all will be
gone when one wakes up. It includes involvement of individuals in sharing their pain to others,
writing letters, attending funeral, etc. (Richardson, Cobham and McDermott, 2011). As the
observation made, my brother in law was not able to overcome the pain for at least 12 months. In
grief, it is identified that people take time when the contact or relationship with the dead person
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was strong. The relationship of Jan was his wife and they lived together for 30 years. This way, it
shows that more than half of the life span was spent together and so that the pain face will be
high. Brother in law shared memories of his wife in conversations and went to her grave every
week. Among these main benefit that a person get is with the help of sharing information
(Everitt, DeBra and AlMeshari, 2011). When information of feelings is shared with other, then it
becomes favourable enough to reduce the pain. In spite of all these activities that were done, it
took more than 12 months’ time to overcome the situation.
To work through the pain and grief: There are many different type of emotions that a
person goes through and these make individuals to face changes in the behaviours that were
normally not done. When a person is not able to overcome the condition, then it becomes
difficult to reduce the rate of pain (Figueiredo, Figueiras and Worden, 2011). In accordance with
this task, people undergo various type of emotions and these made them face various problems
like depression, mood swings, etc. Naturally there are different type of emotions that grief make
it complete like longing, anger, loneliness, sadness, confusion, etc. In all these emotions, it is
difficult for the person to overcome them. In this context, it is required to take up appropriate
steps so that they are able to control these emotions in appropriate manner. In accordance with
the observation made, it is identified that my brother in law was not aiming at controlling his
emotion and this was done by showing strong expression so that other may think that the person
has successful able to overcome the pain (Risi, Noone and Worden, 2013). The type of emotion
that is carried out by individual differs. For example, some will cry, some talk, some will make
themselves busy. My brother in law was able to focus on the interacting with other so that he
could reduce the pain. There is nothing working in controlling their grief through their actions.
For example, for a person whose friend died due to cancer will focus on providing adequate
support other people who are facing similar type of condition. All these type of activities enable
the person to reduce the rate of pain and in making them realize the condition in appropriate
manner (Schaufeli and Taris, 2013).
Adjust to the world without your loved one in it: When a person face any type of loos like
death, then they time is considered to be one of the main aspects that helps to overcome the pain.
For any type of pain, it requires time for a person to understand the situation and to solve them.
In talking about small points, it can be stated that individuals need to find another preferable
think that can support in order to make the person overcome the problem in appropriate manner
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(Worden and Hensman, 2012). This task is a type of challenge in which individuals have to
consider some of the activities that can support to overcome the pain. After certain period of
time, people who have lost their loved once start going to their normal routine. All this process
takes time to adjust and to be on the same place when they once were. As per the observation
made, it is identified that my brother in law has found another partner for himself. This shows
that he has focused on making his life as it was. However, it is identified that when a person dies,
then their loved once will always try to find their relatives who possess similar characteristics
(Jenkins, Wiklund and Brundin, 2014). In consideration with my sister Jan, she did not had any
kids and so, it is difficult for my brother in law to find out some who could actually remind him
of his wife. However, the involvement of a new partner helped him a lot to overcome the pain as
the new person has children’s and even grand children’s and so it supported him to overcome the
issue in effective manner. Apart from this the distance from his place to the new partners place
was very long and so it was helpful enough to make him occupied.
To find and enduring connection with the deceased while moving forward with life: in
accordance with this type of task, a person who undergoes grief is able to find an appropriate
ongoing connection with their emotional lives towards the person who is dead (Kerig, Becker
and Egan, 2010). It consists of memories and emotions that were shared with that person
motivate or encourages so that we are able to let go all the negative issues that were faced. The
person is able to realize that even after death of a person, life never stops and there are many
other aspects that need to be focussed on. There is different type of strategies applied by person
so that are able to overcome the condition. There are supports that can be taken from the side of
therapist, medications can be take, etc. (Bell and Taylor, 2011). All these enable to reduce the
pain and when there are supports that a person gets from these places, then it becomes easy for
one to live a normal life. As per the observation made, it is identified that the main factor that
was helpful enough to reduce the issue was with the help of time that has passed on. There is
many times in which for each any every conversation included that mention of dead person. This
is a type of love and care that a person shows for others even when they are not more. After a
person’s death, loved once are not able to forget them, their teachings, their love, caring nature,
etc. but with time, people aim at finding same love and affection form others and this is only
possible when they are able to move forward in their life and let go that conditions that raised
(Sands and Tennant, 2010).
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With the help of this model, it is helpful enough for a person to understand the type of
condition that they are required to be considered so that they can overcome the pain. Each of the
four tasks involved helps to make sure that they are able to reduce the pain and to live a normal
life. However, it is identified that one of the main disadvantage that is faced in this context, s that
the type of perception that are carried out by individuals are different and when the person is not
able overcome them, then the total time that is consumed increases (Calvo and D'Mello, 2010).
PART B
Contemporary model (Robert A Neimeyer)
According to Robert, there are many condition in a person goes through when there are
situation of grief faced. It is important to make sure that they are able to focus on the conditions
and taken up steps to overcome them. In this context, there is three days’ workshop that took
place and these were helped in provide each one to know that aspects that are required to be
considered so that the pain faced can be reduced (Van Orden, Witte and Joiner, 2010). With this
respect, below given are the division of work made for the condition in which the workshop that
took place:
Models of mourning and processing the event story of the death: In the first day of the
workshop, main focus of this aspect was made on considering the emotions that a person goes
through which situation of grief is faced. Apart from this, there is various type of challenges that
are also faced and these happen, then individuals are not able to understand the condition
(Stroebe, Schut and Boerner, 2010). There will be some of the people who will prefer to cry,
some will try to be brave and do not show their emotions. In all the conditions, it is required to
flow with the activities that are performed by emotions as this is helpful enough to reduce the
pain. Apart from this, there are different steps that are taken so that the pain that a person goes
through due to losing a person can be reduced. Further, they also consider turning to therapy in
which they get suggestions from others who would help them to understand the condition clearly
and to take up decision so that they will be able to overcome them. Further, there are individuals
who aim at focusing on the condition in which people determine the difference between absence
and presence (Parkes and Prigerson, 2013). When a person is able to make these type of
differentiation at time of therapy, then it becomes favourable to develop positive perception
within the mind of individuals. Further, there are other related empirical risk factors that are
involved which make the person to take up steps so that the total time that is consumed can be
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reduced. From the observation made, at the initial stage my brother in law was facing many
problems among which one of the main issue that were faced by him was to overcome the
situation of the memories that are faced (Stroebe and Schut, 2010). The place in which a person
lives and memories make it difficult to overcome the pain and this causes serious problem in
order to make the situation to reduce its negative impact.
Accessing the back story of the relationship: Due to death a life can come to end but the
relationship remains same. In this context, grieving can be considered to be the process of
reconstructing in a person can have the refined memories that allow them to live their life in
effective manner. When a person goes through grief, then they go through an emotional distress
that causes them changes in behaviours or mood swings. More specifically, they fail to react as
per the condition asks them to do so (Holland and Neimeyer, 2010). Further, there are many
obstacles that are also faced in which it consists of situation in condition to grief. With this
respect, it includes issue on controlling emotions, ways to react, difficulty in taking with others,
etc. It requires to take time so that the person can understand the condition and take up
appropriate steps so that they are able to overcome them in appropriate manner. In such
condition, it is important that support is provided from the side of other members of the family or
friends so that they are able to understand the fact and live with it. Future is dependent upon the
condition that is faced and the situation that are carried out, it is required that with the help of
interaction and motivation form other people enables to get support and they are able to reduce
the pain that are faced by them (O’Connor, Lasgaard and Guldin, 2010). In accordance with the
observation made, it can be stated that support from the side of other family members was
helpful enough to consider that problem and to overcome them effective manner.
Addressing unfinished business and the immunity of change: This is considered to be the
stage in which a person focuses on accepting the loss for the person that is faced. When this is
mentally accepted, then it becomes each and to overcome the pain each of the person who
through it they all make use of different type of strategies (Richardson, Cobham and McDermott,
2011). In this context, there are some of them who will aim at making themselves occupied with
work, some will share their feelings and there are people who would try to find out some other
person who have similar characteristics. All these conditions make the person boosted up and in
making them overcome the situation. In accordance with the observation, my brother in law
focused on finding on another person and the person selected had children’s and grand children’s
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as well. When these are done, then it becomes favourable enough to get occupied with new lives
are involved (Everitt, DeBra and AlMeshari, 2011). All these conditions make the person to
overcome them in appropriate manner. All these conditions make the person to consider the issue
and to take up steps to face through the grief.
PART C
Integrating elements of both traditional and contemporary models
Worden theory of grief have direct relation to four tasks described it. As per his analysis
of all the four tasks are achieved by the individual, the process of mourning is said to be
complete and the state of equilibrium can be re-established. Hence, the first step is related to
acceptance to the reality of loss (Figueiredo, Figueiras and Worden, 2011). It is important for the
individual to understand that he / she has lost something in his / her life. It is the core practice to
be performed in order to realize the grief. The second task in this theory is related to work
through the pain of grief. It is the state where various emotions are experienced by the individual
in the form of pain, loneliness, despair, guilt blame, anger, etc. The danger is where individual is
not ready to accept the loss or pain he / she is going through. The third task is related to making
adjustment in the environment where the deceased individual is missing. It is an important aspect
of recovery phase where internal, external and spiritual adjustments are required to be made by
people without the presence of deceased (Risi, Noone and Worden, 2013). In the last and final
task from the theory propounded by Worden states with respect to endure connection with the
decreased while moving to a new phase of life. Hence, it can be stated that Worden have been
able to effectively mention regarding how pain can be felt by the individual and process of the
same. The writer has been able to draw out various facts of importance of feeling and
implementing loss in the normal life and move towards the phase of recovery. Moreover, it has
also been mentioned that in order to recover from the loss it is important for the individual to
through the period of grief as well (Schaufeli and Taris, 2013).
On the other hand, contemporary theory, that is, Robert A Neimeyer theory mentions
regarding grief being both adaptive and complicated format. The theory highlights the challenges
that are generally faced by people to come up with the grief. It has been able to give adequate
discussion regarding significance of tragic loss and regulation of emotion when exposed to the
grief (Worden and Hensman, 2012). These fundamental dimensions help in handling the loss in
the most appropriate manner and step towards the phase of recovery. Importance of grief
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counselling is another aspect that has been touched in this theory by the researcher. However, the
main limitation of this model is that it is not able to define the process in an effective manner.
The importance of having grief of loss for substantial amount of time is important. However, it
has been able to discuss recovery in rather more effective way (Jenkins, Wiklund and Brundin,
2014). It has been a highly expressive way of showing grief in the written and oral format.
In the end, it can be state that, model used in PART A, which is Worden theory of grief is
rather more impactful and adaptable rather than Robert A Neimeyer theory. The former have
been able to express the steps of grief in a well-defined manner in comparison to the later one.
CONCLUSION
Form the assignment, it can be concluded that the rate of emotions that a person feels can
be controlled when there are support that the person has attained from others at the time when
conditions like deaths occur. There are models given by other researcher among which Worden
model is effective to focus on different tasks that are helpful to overcome the pain faced.
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