MR503 - Autobiographical Narrative: My Evolving Concept of Family

This essay presents an autobiographical narrative exploring the author's evolving concept of family, shaped by personal experiences and cultural influences. The narrative begins with an overview of the author's family background in India, highlighting the strong bonds within both the paternal and in-laws' families and the influence of Indian culture. It contrasts Eastern and Western family structures, emphasizing the collectivist nature of Indian families versus the individualistic tendencies in Western cultures. The essay also reflects on the author's experiences after moving to New Zealand, observing differences in family dynamics and social connections. It further discusses the impact of social contexts, such as increasing divorce rates and cultural diversity, on family structures and the upbringing of children, drawing on literature to support the analysis. The author shares personal experiences of cultural integration and the importance of family support in navigating new environments. The essay concludes by emphasizing the enduring influence of cultural values and personal experiences on shaping one's understanding of family.

Running head: ASSESSMENT 2
Assessment 2
Name of the Student
Name of the University
Author Note

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Introduction
Family is the primary environment that influences the effectiveness of family
members' adaptation within the prevailing social, cultural and physical scenario. However,
the family is nested within a set of complex social, political, historical and other cultural
settings and thereby justifying the self-contained nature of each and every family (Drewery &
Claiborne, 2012). The following assignment is based on by personal understanding regarding
how principal events or experiences in my life have helped to shape the concept of the
family. The essay will also highlight how my concept of family has evolved. All the past,
present and the future generations casting a significant influence over the family along with
the role of the social, cultural and con-textural factors over the functioning of my family will
be critically analysed under the light of the evidences derived from review of literature. My
perspective of family and its influence over childhood and adulthood will be based on the
how my upbringing in India and Indian culture. The paper will also highlight my change in
experience and difference in opinion after I moved to New Zealand.
My family overview
My name is Payel Khanna, I am an Indian. I am a married hindu woman who lives
with her husband, mother-in-law, father-in-law and brother-in-law. Before marriage, I used to
live with my father, mother and two elder siblings, one brother and sister. I used to share
strong bond with my siblings and I am feeling extremely happy and proud to say that till now
we share the same wavelength. My in-laws are very supportive and caring and they never
allowed me to feel the absence of my parents in their house. My husband is my best friend
and my brother-in-law always keep be occupied. The similar cultural wavelength of the two
families helped me to adjust easily in my in-laws house. Post marriage, I moved to New

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Zealand with my husband and this helped to explore new horizons in my life. However, I still
miss my life in India, Indian culture and my family members.
Cultural context and family
Pryor (2010) states that the first and the most enduring context within which children
reside are regarded as their family. Under diverse cultures and the societies, there are separate
groupings of people within which the children are raised and these are regarded as the
primary source of socialisation and nurturance. These groupings within the families mainly
vary in their structures and the respective roles that are being played by the members of
family. All the members of my family (paternal family) played a significant role in my life
and my up-bring. Apart from my parents, my grand-parents also played a vital part in my up-
bringing. In my in-laws family as well, I see similar kind of bonding. The elders guide their
off-springs towards the right direction. I have seen, when ever my husband come across any
complex situation in his life, be it professional or personal, the first person from whom he
would seek expert’s advice is his father. This strong bonding between the family members is
the pillar of the Indian family culture. This is the reason why the children from the Indian
family provide significant importance and nurture respect to each of the family members. In
Western cultures, the families mainly tend to develop their own micro-cultures within which
the development of the children occurs. The primary agents for socialization in the Western
cultures are the parents. However, after attaining adulthood (18 years), the children are asked
to stay independently. This approach of independent living and managing own needs
independently, decrease the level of overall bonding with the family members (Pryor, 2010).
This is unlike the eastern family culture. The Indian family system believes in the culture of
joint family along with a strong influence coming from the extended family members. My
family, both in-laws and maternal are nuclear family however, our relatives frequently visits

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our house or vise-versa. We communicate with our extended family members over phone.
Shifting to New-Zealand was thus never a problem from the family related perspectives as I
was well-accustomed with the culture of the nuclear family. However, at times, I miss my
relatives with whom I used to spend share my problems and happiness. In New Zealand also
we have few relatives and we try to visit them once in a while. In context to family and
extended family members, I would like to highlight that post my visit to New Zealand, I have
witnessed that the people in New-Zealand, in the majority of the cases are lonely or
depressed. According to my opinion, the main reason behind this is lack of true friends and
the support coming from the family members.
Kolenda (2017) stated that the family in the Indian society is regarded as an institution
by itself and is a typical symbol of the collectivist culture of India since ancient times. I can
readily connect with the concept of joint family. For me my family is my strength. The
concept of joint family and family bonding hold prime importance in the Indian culture until
a blend of urbanization and influence coming from the western culture shifted the focus from
the concept of the joint family culture to the nuclear family culture. This scenario is
extremely relevant for the urban areas of Indian or in the metropolitan cities where the
nuclear families are gradually becoming the main concept of the family culture (Kolenda
2017). There is no denying of the fact that the socio-economic factors have played a
significant role behind the dilution of the joint family system (Kolenda 2017). Wolf and
Werhane (2017) argued that children who grow up in a joint family, under the presence of
their grand-parents, uncles, aunties and cousins will try to imbibe the qualities of caring,
sharing, empathy and other understandings. However, this might not always be the case of
the children who tend to grow up in a nuclear family. In nuclear families, the sole influence
behind the upbringing of a child comes from his order parents. If the parents are working
parents then the developmental stages of a child experience significant hurdles leading to a

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gap in proper development of the mental state of mind, poor self-esteemed along with in-
securities. Wasal and Singh (2019) however have contradicted saying that the upbringing of
the children cannot be generalized based on the concept of the joint family or nuclear family.
From my childhood up-bringing, I would like to highlight that though I have grown up in a
nuclear family, my thought process are inclined with the central principle of the Indian family
system. The reasons behind this is, me and my family members used to share a deep sense of
bonding with my extended family members with majority of them are separated
geographically from us due to professional concerns. During the summer vacation and
Christmas holidays, either we used to visit their places or they used to drop at our home. We
used to play with our distant siblings and that is how we bonded.
Pryor (2010) stated that in both the cultures, western and eastern, it is only in the rare
and in the aberrant situations that the children grow up under the absence of the adults. My
childhood memories are filled up with events like evening sports, going to zoo with my
parents or my father clicking the group pictures and listening stories from my mother. This
help in increase the level of bonding with my parents and siblings. During my college days, I
used to see that at weekends, my friends refused to stay at home and used to move out of the
house with friends. On contrary I always preferred to spend my quality time with my parents
and my siblings. The bonding that I developed with my parents during childhood went
gradually stronger with the passing years. The mental bonding and the attachment with my
family members are the two sole reasons why I used to enjoy the company of my family
members. After I shifted to New Zealand, I experienced similar essence of Indian culture
under the New Zealand context. Pryor (2010) stated that there are two main cultural
influences over the family structures of New Zealand. Māori whānau have generated in a
collectivist society whereas, Pākehā families are influenced largely by western culture.
However, the process of urbanization that began during the 1940s created a gradual change in

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the family culture of New Zealand. Families are breaking up at higher rates in comparison to
the past and household are headed by lone parents while majority of the adults are re-
partnering more than once. Rigg and Pryor (2007) stated that nearly 5 out of 10 partners file
divorce within 5 years of marriage in New Zealand. This transition in the family structure is
creating a barrier in proper mental and cognitive development of the children (Pryor, 2010).
Pryor (2010) also suggested that children whose parents are separated are vulnerable to
adverse outcomes like behavioural problems and academic difficulties. However, these
outcomes are not inevitable as majority of the children do not experience these outcomes.
Social context and family
In the 21st century, increasing numbers of the families are facing a sea of change in
their composition and at the same time, an increasing number of the young people are
experiencing familial transformation (Rigg & Pryor, 2007). Children are least likely to have
initiated the process of transition. Nevertheless, they (children) are inherently involved in the
process of transition (parental separation). Under the context of New Zealand, it can be said
that five out of then marriages end up in divorce. People who marry young or when both the
partners are working, the chances of dissolving the marriages are higher. This increased cases
of divorce filing are leading to the generation of family transition (Rigg & Pryor, 2007). The
adolescents and children residing in New Zealand have quite a realistic and inclusive view
about the family. They mainly depict diversity in the family concepts. This thought process of
diversity or accepting others like the way they are is helping to increase the concept of
cultural diversity within the adolescents and young children in New Zealand (Rigg & Pryor,
2007).This diversified nature of accepting the other cultures, highlight the societal context of
equality and secularism. The same concept also holds true for the Indian culture. India is
known as the land of diversity and this diversity in culture help the Indian children to accept

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the change in a whole-hearted manner (Leonard & Tibrewal, 2017.). As per my personal
experience, I would like to highlight that my visit to New Zealand created no significant
change in my thought-process of secularism and unity in diversity that I preserved in my
mind. I received a warm welcome and never experienced any instances of victimization
associated with ethnicity and cultural background. Reid, Kagan and Scott-Little (2019) stated
that “culture” is no longer thought to be a family-based characteristic that operates over the
development of the children in predictable ways. Culture instead is considered inseparable
from the overall developmental process under which the children make use of the cultural
artefacts from numerous contexts in order to make sense of their experiences and at the same
time modify the artefacts of culture that they employ. Thus I would like to say that the social
structure of India do not limit the children towards any particular culture rather increases the
sense of cultural diversity. While my stay in India, I used to celebrate both Christmas and Eid
in spite of being a Hindu. I feel that the society of India is liberal towards diverse culture and
thus making my childhood memories more diverse with friends coming from different
religions. It is due to diverse friends’ circle, I experienced no significant problem in
socializing with the New Zealand inmates and thus helping me to make friends easily. In
context of family, past, present and future generation, I would like to highlight the concept of
socialization, the circumference of the world has decreased and increased the level of
acceptance towards other culture and with the advent of social media. Social media ha also
helped to increase the boundary of the family. I have friends in Facebook from different
cultural and ethnic origin and thus helping me to increase by level of acceptance towards
other ethnicity. This is the reasons, why I do not find New Zealand people alien, as social
medial has helped me to get a perspective of New Zealand and its culture.

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Conclusion
Thus from the above discussion it can be stated that my up-bring in India with my
family have helped me to survive in a complete new country, New Zealand. From my
personal understanding and realization, I would also like to highlight that social, political and
cultural factors play an important role in the early cchildhood. This field of the childhood,
family-based education mainly perpetuates the dominant values and practices that mainly
operate in the broader society. Proper support coming from the family members along with
the values and teachings shared by the family members make a child develop independent
thought process. This independent thought process help in the development of secularism and
thus helping to survive and achieve success in a completely new demographic area and
societal context.

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References
Drewery, W., & Claiborne, L. B. (2012). Human development: Family, place, culture (pp.
28-64). Sydney, Australia: McGraw-Hill Education.
Dupuis, S. (2010). Examining the blended family: The application of systems theory toward
an understanding of the blended family system. Journal of Couple & Relationship
Therapy, 9(3), 239-251.
Kolenda, P. M. (2017). Region, Caste, and Family Structure: A comparative study of the
Indian “joint” family. In Structure and change in Indian society (pp. 339-396).
Routledge. Delhi, India
Leonard, K.B. and Tibrewal, C.S., 2017. Occupations and Ethnicity. Immigration and
Entrepreneurship: Culture, Capital, and Ethnic Networks, Routledge. p.141.
Bangaluru, India
Parthasarathy, R., & Rao, V. (2017). Deliberative democracy in india. The World Bank.
Retrieved from: https://openknowledge.worldbank.org/handle/10986/26245
Pryor, J. (2010). New Zealand families: Diversity and change. In J. Low, & P. Jose (Eds.),
Lifespan development: New Zealand perspectives (pp. 187-195). Auckland, New
Zealand: Pearson.
Reid, J. L., Kagan, S. L., & Scott-Little, C. (2019). New understandings of cultural diversity
and the implications for early childhood policy, pedagogy, and practice. Early Child
Development and Care, 189(6), 976-989.
https://doi.org/10.1080/03004430.2017.1359582
Rigg, A., & Pryor, J. (2007). Children’s perceptions of families: What do they really think?
Children & Society, 21, 17-30.

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Wasal, N., & Singh, S. (2019). Indian Family and its Changing Scenario in RuralPunjab:
Some Major Causes. Indian Journal of Economics and Development, 15(4), 591-599.
DOI : 10.5958/2322-0430.2019.00076.3
Wolfe, R. W., & Werhane, P. H. (2017). Introduction: The Indian context: Breaking
Boundaries. In Global Women Leaders. Edward Elgar Publishing. University of
Virginia, US